Sooo... I made the call to the guy that handles admissions into the substance abuse IOP program. Ginny kind of "nudged" me into doing it. She just walked out and told me to call him. I kind of realized I could fake-call him, but I didn't really want to. I hate calling people I don't know (and some that I even do), so she let me write a sort of script. I went into pleasant social-worker mode and just kind of knocked it out, but it was really uncomfortable.

I'm starting to really like Ginny. She's assertive and honest, like telling me how she could relate to me as an only child that was brought-up to think that she should rely mostly, if not only, on herself. She's had her own struggles with substance abuse. I just wish she acted more like she understood how fucking much I struggle with my eating disorders. I mean, seriously, they were my life for a long period of time. I know she's concerned, but I was used to Kelly, who was awesome awesome awesome with keying into what was underneath all of the crazy cycles I went through. With Ginny, it's more goal orientated. Like, I'm expected to take responsibility and GET SHIT DONE. For real real. She is also very forthright in telling me when she is in the right of sharing her own truths and when I am overstepping my boundaries. Like today when she said something about my laugh that involved an adjective I find particularly uncomfortable, regardless of it being positive. She told me I can be uncomfortable, but she was speaking from her own truth. I, of course, made nice and apologized, etc., but it actually made sense. She doesn't tiptoe or walk on eggshells around me. She gives me a lot of credit, maybe more than I think I deserve. She actually said she was proud of me. She actually teared up a little bit... which, of course, made me cry. I explained so much to her, like how I was raised to be a feminist and a fierce little monster with no weakness, but how in reality I am just so fucking complex with so many different facets, that even I find my self confusing.

We have a session with my grandparents and my mother on Thursday. And, I'd just like to take this time and space to give that a big GOD FUCKING DAMMIT. I even explained to her how I have to maintain a certain front and balance of certain energies and play a certain part to cooperate in a family session, or I shut down. I just... Shut. Down. Kind of like the stereotypical humanoid robot shutting down. I just collapse and crumple and become so indifferent and numb.

In conclusion, I like Ginny.

And I don't think mirror pics are that bad if you're taking them with a Canon Rebel.
I feel like the Canon Rebel cancels out the shitty idea of mirror pics. AND LOOK HOW CUTE I AM. How can you hate on me when I'm just so damn adorable?

p.s. Ginny asked me "por que" today and I had to do my little "SCORE!!!" hand-motion it was beautiful, trust me.